ManagementSpeak« Previous Entries
ManagementSpeak: Solve. Translation: Determine the number of actual working employees you must fire in order to balance your budget and unbalance the organization. Thanks go to this week’s contributor, who solved our need for a great ManagementSpeak while pointing out that “solve” doesn’t always mean “do math.”
“The problem with the future is that when it shows up, I’m always older.” — Unknown
ManagementSpeak: We will have upper management visitors in our offices on Friday. Those are typically days we like to make the greatest production possible. I suggest looking for customer-facing time, in the field, closing those last orders of the week. We all want to maximize our sales efforts and be as productive as we can. […]
“Three may keep a secret if two are dead.” — Ben Franklin
ManagementSpeak: You’re a valuable member of the team. Translation: We hope you don’t take your accounts with you when we let you go. And we at KJR hope everyone continues to listen for ManagementSpeaks. Thanks!
“Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.” — Mark Twain
ManagementSpeak: Our consolidation means that our internal apps will now be supported by the same team that developed them. Translation: The number you have reached is not in service at this time … Correspondent L.T. loves watching companies try to use the “reduce-headcount-to-achieve-prosperity” process … but only from a safe distance.
ManagementSpeak: Mr. Lewis, I would prefer anonymity. Translation: I’m somewhat concerned with reprisal from tiny-brained despots who, if there is a benevolent God, will burn for eternity in the sulphurous bowels of hell. Today’s contributor asked to remain anonymous for reasons I hope are obvious.
ManagementSpeak: I would really value your input on this report. Translation: I haven’t got a clue about this. Thanks to Glenn Williams, our clue-full source, who gets credit by name because, “he’s retired and free from threats of retribution.”
“A good leader inspires other men and women with confidence. A great leader inspires them with confidence in themselves.” – Eleanor Roosevelt« Previous Entries